Happy Referral Day!

Kevin and I, we were that couple. The one left with empty arms and heavy hearts while the rest of the couples of the entire world conceived without even trying and gave birth to baby after baby. At least it seemed that way.

And then we were that couple. The one with a spring in our step and smiles as wide as the sea. We held onto hope like it was a kite bouncing in the wind. With adoption everything is up in the air, so we grabbed on and tilted our faces to the sun, catching a glimpse of the beauty at the end of that long string. We pulled tight and waited nine months to the day.

April 24, 2010 came and hope tagged along for the ride across the world. We received the call and heard the name and held the photos of that tiny babe with dark almond eyes and we fell in love. Hard and fast and something fierce. For the first time in what felt like years, we breathed deep. This little wonder all wrapped up in an outfit of light blue and white was our own. The one we had prayed for all along.

Titus Andrew, in your short little life you have experienced grief and loss; joy and love and by God's grace, love sits on top. Being a part of your story and living this life as your mama is a dream and a gift. Your daddy and I are so very proud of you.

Happy Referral Day!  

More than enough

Someone asked me the other day if I still had a blog, and I felt something catch in my throat. You see, I love my blog. I love looking back over this amazing journey God has created. I love our little family.  I love looking back on memories and moments.  I love watching my son grow and reliving the little milestones of his life.   Lately, so many things have come in the way of me having time to keep up on here.  I am learning very quickly that raising, training, disciplining, and teaching a child, keeping a home, and having the marriage I desire is no easy feat.  There are just days I can't do it all.

God blessed me with the loves of my life and I need to be there

for him...

 and for him...

Some days I am left wondering am I ever going to be enough...

good enough
wise enough
strong enough

healthy enough
spiritual enough

mothering enough

teaching enough 

organized enough

 Then I'm left with the realization I never will be.

In the still of the morning, as my feet hit the floor and a new day has begun, I seek His face. And I am reminded once again that I don't have to be. Because He is. He is enough.

"Do not fear, for I am with you; do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." Isaiah 41:10

So today, I begin anew.  One foot in front of the other, relying on Him, trusting in Him, seeking His face in all I do.  Blog posts may go unwritten, laundry may pile up, dishes may be waiting in the sink, emails may go unanswered for a few days. However, I keep moving forward even when I fail, when things go undone, even when I can't be enough.  Because He never expected me to be perfect. He never expected me to have all of the answers. He never expected me to do it on my own.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me."  II Corinthians 12:9

Sniff, sniff...

My baby isn't such a baby anymore!